New Jersey couples who are getting a divorce may want to consider mediation instead of litigation. However, mediation is not the right choice for everyone. For mediation to work, the couple must generally wish each other well. If one person wants revenge, there could be problems in the process.
Both people must be able to advocate effectively for themselves. One issue that often arises is that a person may want something so desperately in the divorce, such as custody of the children, that they will agree to unreasonable terms. Mediation is also not a good idea if the relationship was either emotionally or physically abusive.
Mediation is generally not a speedy process, so couples who are in a hurry might want to consider another approach. People should also be aware that one person might try to prolong the process to avoid having to pay support. The couple must also want to settle through mediation. Even if there is a lot of conflict in the divorce, the couple may be able to resolve their differences through mediation. Furthermore, the process can be much cheaper than litigation and both parties are more likely to be satisfied with the outcome in mediation than in litigation.
If a couple does choose divorce mediation, a person might want to start by sitting down with the attorney and discussing how property division and child custody discussions might proceed. Privately clarifying goals before the negotiations begin might help the person when the process becomes emotionally difficult. The person might be both more cooperative and a better self-advocate with these points in mind. In negotiating child custody and mediation, parents may want to try to make decisions in the best interests of the children just as a judge would do.
